Chasing Life

I haven't posted a blog in 10 months. This was mostly due to the extreme craziness of my senior year of undergrad. Here's a small update on what's been going on with me since last September:

I am no longer a vegetarian. That literally lasted 3 weeks. I couldn't take it.
I sprained my ankle in November, and basically could not/ did not work out from November to February.
Because of this.. and some other things, I've gained back all the weight I've lost and then some.

I'm at my highest weight ever. This is very upsetting to me. Barely any of my clothes fit. I have a hard time getting up off the floor. I am uncomfortable.

I cannot do this anymore. I need to change. Today I am changing the way I do things.

I am going to eat better. I am going to exercise more. I am going to drink more water. I am going to change my life.

New Adventures

I haven't blogged in over a month. The last month has been crazy. School started... need I say more? More recently, in the last 2 weeks I have made some decisions to get back on track and work more.

I became a vegetarian. You're thinking, "but Faith.. you need protein". Guess what? Protein can be found in other things besides meat! It can be found in dairy products, nuts, beans, legumes, etc. Honestly, I'm probably eating more protein now than I was before... and it's healthier proteins.

I also bought T25. That's a program by the same people who put out Insanity and P90X. You focus for 25 minutes a day, for 25 minutes a day on different areas of your body. I started on Monday... and while I'm not as sore as I thought I would be... I'm still sore.

I'm also still going to my trainer (and friend). She's amazing. Even though she has a bum knee right now, she still put my work out buddy and me through the ringer today. I think she was making us work out for her too... just kidding!

I stepped on the scale today at my trainers and guess what??? I'm at 201!!! That's back to my pre-vacation weight AND super close to one-derland! ^_^   I'm going to work super hard this week so that next week I'm there! It'll happen guys! It will!

Here's my stats for this week:

Starting weight: 208.4 lbs

Current weight: 201lbs

Goal weight: 150 lbs

Pounds to go: 51

Weeks until deadline: 23

Avg loss per week to reach goal: 2.22 lbs

The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week [or two]

Yesterday as I stepped on the scale at my trainer's house, I knew it wasn't going to be a pleasant number that I would see. I had tried to make good choices while on vacation, I really did. But I failed... A LOT. I shouldn't have eaten at Steak 'n Shake.. or had that milkshake. I probably shouldn't have had those M&Ms.. or chips. I can't do anything about it now.

 Granted, this gain was from 2 weeks and not just one.. but it was still not going to be pleasant. I looked down and saw a number worse than I had imagined.

I gained nearly 8 pounds.

After texting one of my best friends and telling her that I suck and feeling completely defeated... she reminded me that I don't suck and I just had more to lose now. It's all about perspective.

Yesterday, I worked out with my trainer and work out buddy. Journaled every bite of food and drank all of my water.

Today, I was going to wake up and go for a run.. however, I bent over this morning to pick something up and almost got stuck. My back is in pain, but it's nothing that Aleve, IcyHot, and a little rest can't fix. I'm still journaling my food..

I can't let this gain get the best of me. I won't allow it. Time to get over it and move forward.. Now I just have more to lose this week.

Here's my stats for this week:

Starting weight: 208.4 lbs

Current weight: 208.8 lbs

Goal weight: 150 lbs

Pounds to go: 58.8

Weeks until deadline: 28

Avg loss per week to reach goal: 2.1 lbs

The Great Return

I know I said I would be back at it last week. But let's be real... I didn't. Now, I didn't do all that badly. I tried to eat well. I didn't do great at it.. but I tried. And.. confession: I ate french fries on Sunday. I hadn't had fried food in almost 2 months. Do you know what I learned? I'm not missing anything. It isn't even that good.

I just got back from a run 15 minutes ago. My first run in... at least 2 weeks. I expected it to be the worst run ever since it had been so long. However, I was pleasantly surprised when it took me 11:48 to run a mile. It's not my fastest time, but it's only 10 seconds away from it. But at the end of the first mile, I did something funny to my leg which caused me to walk the rest of the way home. I still went 2.75 miles.

This is real life. Things get tough. I'm not a superstar dieter with cameras all around me to show people that I'm working out and eating right. That would be the most nerve wrecking experience! It's hard enough for me to blog about it. But, I do it.. because it keeps me honest. I know my trainer stalks me on here.. and anywhere else I post fitness things. My workout buddies keep me exercising. My best friends ask me how I'm doing. My best friends' mom makes note of how "skinny" I am every time she sees me. It keeps me going. THANK YOU ALL. If it weren't my my gigantic support system, not even my determination would keep me going.

I don't have a weight for this week. I don't trust any scale but my trainers (especially since my doctors scale was 3 lbs off).. and things didn't work for me to go there this week. But I will have one next week!

As my favorite person from Biggest Loser (Season 14) says:

Crazy

Two weeks ago when I blogged it was right after I went to the doctor and it said I gained 3 lbs which through me for a loop. BUT I channeled all that rage into working out.. I went to my trainer the next day.. she weighed me and I had actually stayed the same. Which goes to show.. only trust one scale.

Also.. last week I went to 2 weddings, and a birthday party. I had a little bit of cake at each one. But I made healthy choices the rest of the day. Last week, I lost 3 lbs! I just didn't blog about it. My fault. I got lazy. I got so lazy in fact that I didn't work out last week.. much. I think I worked out twice. I didn't log my food like I'm supposed to. I tried to make good choices, which I was mostly good at. I did eat pizza at work the other night.

But... ONE MEAL DOES NOT MAKE YOU GAIN WEIGHT. Eating an excess of calories on a regular basis does.

I went to my work out with my trainer and my favorite work out buddy today.. I lost another 2.6 lbs!! I'm at 201.2 lbs!! Since I started my weight loss journey, from my highest weight, I've lost 44 lbs! I'm so close to ONE-DERLAND that I can smell it!

If I can do it... you can too!

I was that girl who hated working out. I was afraid of the gym. I hated running. I hid behind baggy jeans & huge t-shirts.
NOW: I LOVE working out. I like going to the gym. Running is my best friend. I wear skinny jeans, dresses, and cute shirts..

YOU CAN DO IT TOO! You're thinking, "Faith.. you're crazy." Yup, I am.. but I like myself this way.. and admit it.. you do too!

Here's my stats for this week:

Starting weight: 208.4 lbs

Current weight:201.2

Goal weight: 150 lbs

Pounds to go: 51.2

Weeks until deadline: 30 

Frustration

Today has been a very frustrating day for me. Actually.. This week has been rather frustrating.
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Sunday night I was craving pizza. So, I made some frozen pizza. I ate more than half the pizza by myself. Granted, Sunday is my cheat day, but I shouldn't be scarfing down pizza on my cheat day.

Monday- I had very little sleep.. so I don't even remember what I ate that day and I didn't log anything in my food journal either.

Yesterday, I honestly didn't even try.

Today, I went to the doctor. I stepped on the scale and it showed that I gained 3 lbs. Which, is probably water weight and due to the fact that I haven't been paying attention. But what really upset me was that my doctor told me that since my weight was so high that I needed to come back for blood tests to see if I had high cholesterol or diabetes. That felt like a slap in the face.. I got into my car and cried all the way to Walgreens to pick up a prescription (which was also frustrating).

I channeled all my frustration into eating well today, and going for a run. I prayed about it.. and I'm trying not to be upset about it.. but it's hard. Here I am, having lost 30 lbs since the last time I went to the doctor. I don't have any symptoms of anything (besides eczema).. and now she wants to test me for high cholesterol and diabetes?? It doesn't make sense to me.

I looked up what my BMI is.. and I'm in the obesity range. But what shocked me was by how much. For my height, to not be considered obese anymore.. and just overweight, I have to get to 185 lbs. That means losing 24 lbs. I know I can do it.. I've lost that much already. I know I need to get there. It's just insanely frustrating to be where I'm at now.. when I work so hard already.

Here's my stats for this week:

Starting weight: 208.4 lbs

Current weight: 209.6 lbs

Goal weight: 150 lbs

Pounds to go: 59.6 lbs

Weeks until deadline: 33 weeks

Pump it!

Hey all!

The last week has been super motivating!  Friday night my manager/friend brought some dresses for me to try on for a couple of weddings at the end of the month. There's a GORGEOUS purple dress that I adore. However it's tight... By tight I mean it won't zip up... At all. These weddings are in 10 & 11 days.. It would take a miracle for them to fit. But I'm working for that miracle. I've worked out every day since then. Every time I want to give up during a work out, I think, "purple dress... purple dress..." over and over again

I realize that it's a bit far-fetched to think that I could go from not being able to zip up this dress to being comfortable in iron this short of a time period. But it won't be from a lack of trying. 

I also had my trainer weigh me today. I gained .8 lbs, but with amping up my work outs, I'm not surprised it went up a little. I'm gaining muscle like crazy! But I feel smaller... because a pound of muscle takes up less room than a pound of fat. :)

Starting weight: 208.4 lbs

Current weight: 206.8 lbs

Goal weight: 150 lbs

Pounds to go: 56.8 lbs

Weeks until deadline: 33 weeks

Between Happiness and Disappointment

Hey all,

I had my trainer weigh me today.  The first time I stepped on the scale it showed an insane amount of loss. I almost cried, but just to make sure it was right I stepped on the scale about five more times. Three of these times it read "error".. and the next two were not as insane of an amount. I did lose weight... I lost 2.4 lbs! Which is good.. it's closer to my goal [that's what I keep telling myself], but it's still about a pound and a half short of where I wanted to be after two weeks.

I know it's because I've been working out more.. and while my clothes are fitting better because I've lost fat, I've gained muscle. Which takes up less room... but I'm slightly disappointed, even though I know I shouldn't be. Perhaps, I'm too hard on myself. I just keep thinking "what if I didn't have that slice of pie on the 4th... and the next day?" and "I should've worked out more..." but that's only going to make things worse.

If I'm going to do this, I have to stay positive.

Starting Weight: 208.4 lbs
Current Weight: 206 lbs
Goal Weight: 150 lbs
Pounds to go: 56 lbs
Weeks until deadline: 34

In a Weeks Time

Hey all!

It's been a crazy week with work and 4th of July. However... In the last week:

I have done---
Bob Harper's Ab workout video (crazy intense.. but the man is a genius). I can't lie.. I didn't finish the whole video. I did half and I couldn't move anymore.

Zumba! Shout out to my Zumba friends! You're the best!

Cleaned my whole level of the house

Ab Pro workout app! (it's free!!)

Ran--
2.31 miles on Monday
2.89 miles today

My eating wasn't spot on yesterday because of the holiday. I didn't even track. But I tried to make good choices. As well as on Wednesday night when we celebrated my mom's birthday. But I'm back on track today.

I don't have a weight for you because I don't trust any scales except the one at my trainer's and she's out of town. But I will have one on Tuesday. Promise! I'm hoping that I'll have lost a significant amount, but with how much I've been working out, I'm not sure since I'm probably gaining muscle at a significant rate. But, we shall see...

Check ya all later! <3

Beast Mode

Guess what?! My trainer weighed me and I actually weigh 208.4 lbs. Which means instead of 60 pounds to lose, I have 58.4! I know that may not seem like much... but that's 1.6 lbs that I don't have to worry about. 

Anyways.... The last 2 days have been.... INTENSE!

Monday: I went for a run after posting the previous entry. 1.73 miles in 23:43. WOOT! Then I went to work... and it was crazy busy because the Blackhawks were playing... and they won! I should really get a pedometer so I know how far I walk at work.. I'm sure it's a ton! 

Tuesday (yesterday): I went to see my personal trainer with my work out buddy, and we did a interval/circuit thing. We did squat thrusts, squat presses, push ups, and sit ups in intervals of 3 (first set: 3 of each, second set: 6 of each, third set: 9 of each... you get the idea). I did the math and I figured out that we did 84 push ups and sit ups.. and 168 squats. CRAZY.  Then later in the day, I went to zumba class... so, needless to say I'm sore today.

Food related victories: 

Yesterday, I went to see World War Z with a friend, and she offered me some of her popcorn. I LOVE POPCORN... especially movie theater popcorn.. but I declined. That is huge for me. 

Last night I went out to Applebee's for one of my best friends birthdays. I got a chicken fajita wrap (totally delicious.. since I worked out so much yesterday I splurged a little on my food, but not to worry.. I was still in my calorie range). I asked for the vegetables instead of fries. The waitress brought me fries anyway. Which are fried.... obviously. I refused to touch them. I let my friends eat them instead.

Today, I didn't work out at all. Like I said earlier, I'm sore from yesterdays workout. I can barely move my arms and it hurts to laugh. But tomorrow I'll be back at it! I have a goal to reach and I'm not quitting this time! 

Long Time Coming

I'm aware that nobody really reads this blog. Mostly due to the fact that I don't advertise much that I have it.... nor do I update it. The last time I wrote on it was almost a year ago. FAIL on my part.

I weighed myself the other day on my Grandpa's 50 year old scale (so, who knows if it's right...) and I weighed 210 lbs. I'll find out a legitimate weight tomorrow when I go to see my physical trainer.

My goal weight is 150 lbs. In order to get there, I will have to lose 60 pounds. Which is the same amount as my best fraaan/weight loss buddy/partner in crime needs to lose to get to her goal weight (see Liz's blog here).

Here's the deal:
Deal #1: I'm going to update this blog at least twice a week. It keeps me honest.
Deal #2: I'm going to work out 5 times a week, at least 30 minutes each time.
Deal #3: Lose 2 lbs every week.
Deal #4: I will drink 10 cups of water every day.
Deal #5: No fried foods. None.
Deal #6: I will walk everywhere that can be walked. I can easily walk to the grocery store, Walgreens, church, post office, library, park, bank and my favorite coffee shop.

If I lose 2 lbs every single week I will get to my goal weight by January 21, 2014. However, I'm realistic.. and I know that sometimes losing 2 lbs every week isn't obtainable because I'm a girl... and my birthday, Thanksgiving, and Christmas are all in that time period... so, I'll say by March 4, 2014 I will weigh 150 lbs or less. That's right before my very last spring break.. and 2 months before I FINALLY graduate from college.

I'm going to bust this goal. So, send your positive thoughts and prayers my way. I know I'm going to need them! The next 7 to 9 months are going to be hard ones. I'm going to want to give up. I'm going to want to eat that whole bag of cheetos, candy, or fried cauliflower. Don't let me. Remind me of what I'm working towards. Remind me that I've wanted this my whole life.. and while those things will feel good now, I won't feel good about them later. This has been a long time coming.. but it's here and it's not going away.

Let's do it!

A Month of Change

Starting Weight: 218.6 lbs
Current Weight: 216.8
Goal Weight: 145 lbs 
Weight to lose: 71.8 lbs

So, it's been a little over a month since I blogged last (oops!). But here are the things that have changed in the last month...

1. I started working out with a personal trainer once a week. And she's helping me be more consistent with my diet and exercise (mostly because I fear letting someone else down and I need someone to get upset with me when I don't do what I'm supposed to). Basically, she's the best!

2. I've started running.. err.. jogging/walking again.

3. Ya know those crazy sit ups where you throw a ball to someone else, or the squats where you throw the ball and catch it? The ones you watch on the biggest loser and think "HA. yeah right. nobody actually does those." I've got news for you. PEOPLE ACTUALLY DO THAT! I did that on Tuesday..

4. Previously I LOVED potato chips and french fries, do you know what I discovered last week? THEY DON'T TASTE GOOD ANYMORE!

Okay. end of learning things... at least, for now. :)

Revelations

Today, I ate like I was supposed to.. success.

Today, I went down one size at Target... success.

Today... I went to zumba (even though I didn't want to, but my best friend talked me into it) and had the biggest and best revelation:

I can actually do this. 

Before I always talked the talk, but I didn't walk the walk. Today, I felt like I actually could do this. I felt like I had control over this and I wasn't going to let it defeat me again. 

Today I realized that I can actually do this... success. 

New Motivation

Starting Weight: 218.6 lbs
Current Weight: 218
Goal Weight: 145 lbs by Christmas
Weight to lose: 73 lbs in 167 days.


So, after a week of hard work I've kinda not been the best at counting calories and exercising.. actually, I have sucked at it. I haven't done it at all. However, one of my best friends got engaged last weekend... and thus, asked me to be a bridesmaid and the wedding is in the next few months. New motivation to get into shape faster? oh heck yes.

I found these blogs today on pinterest. The first one is about losing weight and being dedicated. She says to make your goal attainable. Yup, check. got that. Do it because I want to, not for others.. check. Eat breakfast: check. Things to be done: make a goal chart (easily done since Liz & I have made some goals for ourselves), schedule my workouts like I schedule work and class (things that I can't skip), keep up with my diet and workout journal.

The next blog is called "The College Girl Diet". First thing that I love that she said: This is a lifestyle, NOT A DIET. You can't just diet and get to your goal weight and then let everything go. You have to eat like that and exercise like that for the rest of your life. It's not just a "one and done" deal. It's an ALL of the time deal. The no's that she talks about that I'm implimenting starting right now:
1) No soda... yes, I know I started drinking it again after not having it since October. My bad. But it's gone now.
2) No fast food. This one is probably going to be the most difficult. This is America.. where we practically live on fast food. My family practically does. But, I'll have to pass on that now. If I want this, that's what I'm going to do.
3) No alcohol. It's a waste of calories. It really is. Those calories that you spend on that drink, are so much better spent on something else.
4) No ordering Large or Extra Large or Biggie.. that's so not needed. Order the half order of everything.
5) Drink more water. Hunger pains are often a sign of dehydration. I wonder if everyone in the country knew this how much healthier our country would be.
6) MOVE, MOVE, MOVE! no more sitting on the couch while a beautiful day passes by.. or even nasty ones. I have 4 workout games for the Kinect, and how often do I play them? uh.. never. Plus, I discovered On-Demand workouts yesterday. I have no excuses for not working out.
7) No mindless eating. No eating while watching TV or on the computer. If I must eat, pick fruits, veggies or healthy items.
8) Allow moments of cheating. Without tiny moments of chocolate or the like, I'd only feel more deprived and it would make that awful binge eating worse.

So.. ready? I am! ....I think.

I'm sorry.. it's what day, again?

Starting Weight: 218.6 lbs
Current Weight: 216
Goal Weight: 145 lbs by Christmas
Weight to lose: 71 in 170 days.

I know.. I know.. I haven't blogged in a week and 2 days. but in that week and 2 days, I've worked... 56 hours, I think. If it weren't for the fact that my family just left all together, I wouldn't know it was Sunday morning because the only time they ride together is to go to church. Seriously, I'm surprised that I'm still functioning.

Okay, so that whole thing that I blogged about last time. It failed right away. BUT.. I did lose 1.4 pounds in the last week and 2 days. I attribute this to eating right (per my new plan on myfitnesspal. (see profile). This works well for me because they have a free app for my phone.. so I can take it everywhere! It's so much easier than when I was using livestrong because I had to wait until I got home and sometimes I forgot.. so, now I can work on it when I'm out and about.. without making excuses.

I also attribute my weight loss to working at a pizza place in 100 degree weather. With 2-3 pizza ovens on, an air conditioner that wasn't built for handling the ovens, and it being 100+ degrees outside, we got very.... toasty. No.. toasty isn't the word.. sweaty? I'm telling you... I was sweating, my sweat was sweating, and my sweat's sweat was sweating. It was a bit ridiculous.. but I'm alive with no damage!

Also, with having been so busy with working I neglected working out this week. Next week will be better. 

Ch-ch-changes

Starting Weight: 218.6 lbs
Current Weight: 217.4
Goal Weight: 145 lbs
Weight to lose: 72.4

So, I gave up facebook for a week.. and that has been my excuse as to why I haven't written anything.

*insert imitation of my own voice* I can't tell people I blogged, what's the point?

I did however weigh myself... My partner in crime, Liz, and I agreed on weighing ourselves every Wednesday morning. So, that weight up there, my friends, is this weeks weight. 

Also.. Liz discovered this website on pinterest (our favorite place to waste time haha). It's about how different body types need different foods and exercises.. which seems like a no-brainer.. but honestly, it was a new revelation for me.

So, I looked at all the different body types and realized that I'm a endomorph. Which means.. I store fat a heck of a lot easier than other body types. Which totally makes sense.. because while I don't eat a lot, I sure look like I do. So, I'm going to try to follow their eating plan.. I'll do a couple of weeks of it because we all know one week isn't enough. and if it's working, then the plan stays.. if not, then I change it up!

So, here's the plan for the next few weeks:

1. avoid all sugars (including fruits, except berries)
2. avoid simple carbohydrates (sweets, white flour products, pasta, white rice, potatoes)
3. Eat starchy vegetables, brown rice, whole grains
4. Eat quality protein (chicken, turkey, lean beef, whey protein)
5. Eat healthy fats: Omega 3 sources (fish, seafood), and coconut oil.
6. Eat smaller portions, and have food handy every 2-3 hours. 
7. Tone up muscle mass 3-4 times a week (my absolute favorite kind of exercise.. no joke)
8. Aerobic exercises 5-6 times a week (**this may be hard right now as I'm fighting being sick.. but I can try)

Don't Quit

Starting Weight: 218.6 lbs
Current Weight: 218.4
Goal Weight: 145 lbs
Weight to lose: 73.4 lbs

Don't Quit. That has been my motto today through everything. Through class: don't quit listening.. maybe he'll say something important (please note: he didn't). Through work: don't quit smiling. customers like smiley people. Through zumba: don't quit unless you faint or throw up. It was so hot in there! Through walking with Kari: okay.. actually, that was fun and I didn't have to tell myself not to quit.

My eating today... was weird. Like, I went over my calories a little... but I also worked out.. A LOT. plus it was about 94* today. Which made working out BEASTLY. but I did it. No quitting. Not today. Not ever. I'm not a quitter. and I can do this.

Every excuse in the book.

Starting Weight: 218.6 lbs
Current Weight: 219.4 lbs
Goal Weight: 145 lbs
Weight to lose: 74.4 lbs


I don't have time.
I don't feel well.
I just don't care.
God made me this way, why even try?
It's too hard.
I don't want to work out.
There isn't healthy food in this house.

These and many others which I cannot think of right now are the reasons why I have basically sucked at changing my life this week. And I know it's hypocritical to say that I made excuses because I am so annoyed by people who do that. So, label me a hypocrite.

I woke up and decided to do what I know I should do today. Eat well, exercise. Did I do those things? Eat well.. yes.. until about 3 p.m. and then it went down hill. And exercise? nope. Didn't happen. I'm all out of excuses. I can't do this to myself anymore. I want to be better. I am better than this.

I was thinking the other day that changing how you eat, or having an addiction to food is one of the hardest addictions to overcome. Think about it. You NEED food to survive. all the other addictions are things that you can live without. They won't kill you to not have those things. Food, on the other hand... well, you kinda need that. The people who fight this battle and win are truly strong. People who overcome addictions of any kind are. It makes me want to be that strong person.

So tomorrow I'll be a little less like this:

and more like this:

Oops

So, I really did mean to post on Tuesday.. but here it is Thursday.. and I haven't posted anything. Oops.

Tuesday I did really well. Ate right, went to Zumba.. felt like this after zumba:

Then Wednesday rolled around.. and I felt sick all day. Headache, sore throat, no appetite.. needless to say, when I actually ate I wasn't paying attention to what I was eating. I also didn't exercise. But, I feel like this is excusable since I was legitimately not feeling well.

Today, however, was inexcusable. What I chose to eat, was not what I should have chosen. I know this because when I eat food that I shouldn't eat, I start feeling bad. When I eat good food, I feel good. Makes sense, right? So then why on earth would I choose to eat bad food? Well, because it's there. My house is filled with food that I should choose not to eat. Somedays I do awesome... and other days, well.. I suck at making good choices. Today was one of those sucky days. 

Tomorrow, I will do better. Because, tomorrow is a new day.

What will you ACTUALLY do?

Starting Weight: 218.6 lbs
Current Weight: 215.6 lbs
Difference: -3 lbs!
Goal Weight: 145 lbs
Weight to lose: 70.6 lbs

The past few days have been really good eating wise. Exercising? CONFESSION: I haven't done anything since Saturday. Sunday I didn't because honestly.. Sunday is my day of "rest" from exercise. Plus, I'm not really home on Sundays to exercise. I consider being a youth leader enough. haha

And today.. well, today was just laziness. I stayed in my room all day watching House, telling myself that I would work out after work. Then I worked, and got home pretty darn close to midnight. and my legs hurt so bad, that I have convinced myself that walking and making pizzas is exercise enough.

Lesson from today: Know what you'll actually do. Are you really going to work out after you get home from work? No, you're not. you're procrastinating. so, get off your butt and exercise now!  << I say this for my benefit, more than yours.

So, what am I going to do tomorrow? get off my butt and exercise!